Remember how Cemetery Gates Media took a chance on my first kids book, A Cemetery Stroll? Well, there’s a sequel out in the fall! The story is simple. Hazel is overwhelmed at a family holiday and escapes to the woods, finding the cabin of her great aunt. There, her and Great Aunt Loretta exchange spooky stories, featuring Pet Spider and The Thing. I love Christmas ghost stories, and I really want this to be M.R. James for kids. I can’t wait you all to see it!

Well, big news on the Apartment 239 front: Screen Queensland is working with Wattpad and Webtoons to adapt my novel Apartment 239 into a TV series!

Here’s a link to the announcement.

This is still in the very early stages, but it’s far enough along that I can announce it. A very exciting development, and a full circle moment too. Apartment 239 started as a pilot script. I even pitched it a few times and somewhere around here I have the pitch bible. That said, that version was very much a broad comedy, there were considerable changes when I make it a novel. I’m excited to see what they do with it!

If you love horror-comedies about cursed towns, ghosts, monsters, and the joys of late-stage capitalism, have I got audiobook for you! That’s right, Apartment 239 is now on Audible, narrated by the great Geoff Sturtevant, who also narrated by four horror collections for Velox Books. You can find it right here. Enjoy!

Less than a month until this one is out, so I thought I could offer a little peek of the prologue. If you’re intrigued, you can preorder the ebook here. Enjoy! -Elford

PROLOGUE: FATHER AND SON

 

“Now son,” Earl said as he ejected the spent round from his rifle. The casing dropped with a slight crackling sound as it disappeared beneath the leaves. “Always remember, nothing goes to waste.”

The setting sun cast long shadows from the line of trees that stretched across the field in front of their home.

This side of seven years old, the boy looked at his father, assessing the deep lines in his face and the sideburns peppered with white and gray. Earl’s red plaid coat hung loose on his thin, yet muscular arms. The boy, short for his age, felt even smaller next to him, and his shock of thick, black hair bounced as he nodded, wiped snot from his nose, and desperately tried to blink the tears from his eyes. Hoping his father didn’t notice, he glanced up and watched as he pulled off his hat, wiped his brow, then pulled it back onto his head.

“I know it seems cruel, but son… sometimes life doesn’t make sense, and sometimes… well, it’s just not fair.” Earl propped the gun against the side of the small white house, located off a dirt road on the outskirts of a small North Texas town called Marble Springs. A place surrounded by trees, cut off from the hum of passing cars. “Clothes are a big one. Save what you can. Also, the cash in the wallet. Never use the cards. Always hide the body, and never in the same place or the same way.”

The boy nodded, looking at the woman at their feet. Her leg jerked for a moment, causing him to gasp.

“Just nerves,” Earl laughed. “Remember, in this world we’re surrounded by copies.”

“Copies?”

“Yes,” Earl said solemnly, removing his ball cap again. “You’re real, and so am I. Your mother,” he waved the cap at her. “She fooled us.”

The boy looked down at her body, her eyes half open, blood trickling down the corner of her mouth.

“They’ll pretend to be your friends, but you’ll have to know who’s real, and who isn’t.”

“How?” the boy squeaked.

“I’ll teach you.” Earl smiled.

My horror-comedy debut is finally available outside of Wattpad! This story kicked around for a few years as a series pitch. I made a very bad novella of it in 2010. Then tried again in 2013 (also bad). The started over in 2016, and finally made it click. I pitched it around, and eventually added it to Wattpad, where it did very well. Now, everyone will have a chance to enjoy it! The book is out November 1st. This is a weird book and honestly a weirdly personal one for me too. It’s dark and creepy, but funny too. I play with horror/comedy a lot, but I think this is the best balance I achieved between the two. Expect the sequel, High Strangeness, in 2023. There’s a third part, which will be out in 2024.

You can preorder it right here.

I was recently invited to submit a story in an epic anthology. Something Bad Happened is edited by the great Jennifer Bernardini, and the cover is by Wayne Fenlon. Bernardini created a journal with an opening line on each page to help jumpstart stories for horror authors. Each tale begins with one of these sentences.  My story focuses on a final girl who tries to break the cycle and finally free herself from a stalking slasher, while also examining the killer/final girl dynamic. It was a fun one to write! I am absolutely outclassed in this anthology, people. Seriously, I have a story in the same anthology as Angel Krause, Bill Davidson, Cindy O’Quinn, Rayne King, Yolanda Sfetsos, Adam Hulse, Ross Jeffery, Laurel Hightower, Brian Bowyer, J.B. Taylor, Steve Stred, Jaime Hernandez, and R. Reyes. It’s also illustrated, how fucking cool is that?!

Well, maybe not all your all dreams, but at least one! I’m so excited to let you know about the Ash and Bone audiobook. I’ve never had my work in audiobook form and damn it, I feel like a real author. Thanks again, Velox Books for setting this up. The book is being read by the incredible author/podcaster/voice of silk Geof Sturtevant. I hear the audio version of The Last Night in the Damned House is ion the horizon too!